Friday, September 22, 2017

Tales from the Floating Vagabond: Parrot Head-case

This week's 5e game at the FLGS was off, since half the group had other events and weren't going to make it. Rather than just cancel outright, I decided to run Tales from the Floating Vagabond, a game I haven't pulled off the shelf since... 2002? And even then, I think I only ever ran it once. This seemed like the perfect opportunity to dust it off.

Plus, I came up with an idea for a ridiculous Jimmy Buffett themed adventure. After sketching down the outline for the adventure, I made up 4 pre-gens:
A Disgustingly Cute Furry Thing Bounty Hunter
Rhino-man Swashbuckler
Robot Tough Guy
Bird-brained Scientist

My 2 players picked the robot and the rhino. After going over the basics of the system, I jumped right into the scenario. Sadly, neither of them were parrot-heads, so the references were completely lost on them. On the upside, as insane as it was, they still had fun.

This is what I wrote up initially:
Space Nazis have stolen the Last Shaker of Salt, and there's a parrot-head convention arriving in hours!! (Just as soon as the concert is over!!) Spit offers a diamond as big as a ritz for getting it back.

Traffic snarled, cars, ships, boats, and planes abandoned all over the place.
Cultural Infidels! Space Nazis have the shaker of salt, but can't get away due to the traffic jam.
·   Billy is running from the big man, who aims to cut him up for sleeping with his woman. Wants protection.
·   Captain America is helping an old mother through the jam, will ask for their help with the busload of other old ladies. They're actually bimbos with guns, who try to abduct him!
·   Hippolyte hates the Parrot Heads just slightly more than he hates Space Nazis. Gives rocket ship to the space station to the Nazis.

USS Zydecoldsmobile –
·   How do you drive this thing?!?
·   What do you mean there's no gas? Who's paying?
·   Jamaica Mistake-a, getting shot at trying to land in Morant Bay

Space Station: Chase and Fights as Space Nazis make for their Shark Class Ship docked in Montego Bay
·   Desdemona's Bake Shop "Cosmic Muffin",
·   Joe Merchant hiding from Frank Bama and hemorrhoid-ointment heiress Trevor Kane,
·   Movie Theater w/ Frank & Lola watching adult movie,
·   Ellis Dee has the shakes and needs a drink.
·   Dance Hall & Tiki Bar - Hokey Pokey, Carmen, Hula/Limbo Contest

Back in time for the party???


Not all the ideas above got used, and of course things went sideways pretty quickly. With laser-like focus on the Space Nazis, the rhino decided to abandon Captain America to the Bimbos, and I skipped Billy since it was repetitive with Cap.

Hippolyte sold his rocket to the Space Nazis for *those* 20 pieces of silver. The players took the silver, and the keys to the Zydecoldsmobile.

Rhino couldn't figure out how to drive stick, but "The Machine!" could. But they realized they were low on gas, so pulled into the station to get some, and paid with the silver. The Machine kept 5 of the 20 sp. Continuing on, the Jamaican Space Station started shooting at them, thinking they were smuggling Ganja. The party floored it through the shooting, and busted into the docking bay. Unfortunately luck wasn't with them, and the cops showed up. Trying to prove that they weren't smugglers, they popped the trunk open, revealing several bales of weed. They ended up spacing the cops by lowering the force field.

Ducking into the maintenance corridors, they get lost, steal a maintenance worker's outfit (which doesn't fit either of them), cash, and ID card, and find their way out into the main station. The Rhino seduces Desdemona and they find the Space Nazis drinking coffee outside the cafe at about the same time Billy Joel runs past, followed by a bunch of rabid fans. In the confusion, some of the Space Nazis get away, rushing into the movie theater, where they take Frank and Lola hostage. The Machine! tries to get the drop on the Space Nazis, but ends up shooting Frank and Lola. The Space Nazis run for it, cutting through the Tiki Bar.

Everyone in the bar is watching Carmen dance. The Machine! shoots twice into the ceiling, causing a panic. They catch up with the Space Nazis back out in the main corridor, where one tries to wrestle with The Machine! and mostly just ends up awkwardly hugging him, while straddling The Machine!'s crotch mounted gun. The Rhino uses his rapier to duel with the last Space Nazi, gets shot, makes his strength check to remain standing, and then takes him out. They grab the shaker, and run off to the shuttle bay.

Getting into the Space Nazi's rocket, they try to hotwire it, but end up setting it on fire, and so move over to the Federation Shuttle, taking it back down to the Floating Vagabond just ahead of the crowd of Parrot Heads. Spit, the bartender takes out a box of ritz crackers, and pulls out a diamond, the size of one of the crackers. They feel like they deserve more, but Spit's cool way beats theirs, and they back down.

A fun time was had by all, and the next time D&D is off, I'll probably run more Tales from the Floating Vagabond!


  1. Was the Rhino Swashbuckler named "Rufus Rodeo" ? :)

  2. I'm glad you guys had a good time! Did you happen to know that you were playing on my (Lee Garvin, creator of TF2V) birthday?

    Keep your eyes peeled to over the next week: BIG things are, a-happening!